Pomp And Circumstances Beyond Your Control
by Collegekid2006
Summary: When Shawn and Gus are invited to a graduation, Shawn leaves out one vital detail...Gus is making the speech.


"Why are we here again, Shawn?" Gus asked as they entered the gymnasium, straightening his tie.

"Gus! I'm surprised at you. High school graduations are very special occasions. The passage from childhood to adulthood. How could we miss it?"

"We've never come to one!" Gus answered, looking confused. "Heck, you even missed our graduation."

"That wasn't my fault. I was unavoidably detained."

"You were making out with Becky Nortingham under the bleachers!"

"Trust me. That was a much more pressing engagement. They could always mail me my diploma."

Gus rolled his eyes and surveyed the rapidly-filling gymnasium for a seat.

"I think I see some seats over there," he pointed. "Come on."

"Oh, didn't I tell you?" Shawn asked innocently. "We have VIP seats."

"VIP seats?" Gus raised a doubtful eyebrow. Something in Shawn's tone was sending up red flags.

Gus had heard that tone before.

Something very, very bad was about to happen.

"Why would we have VIP seats?"

"Because we're the most famous alums this school has ever had. The world-famous psychic detectives."

"We're not world-famous."

"Well, Santa Barbara famous then, Mr. Literal. Don't be such a Suspicious Sally, Gus. Just take the seats. Enjoy the moment."

"Okay," Gus agreed cautiously. "Where are they?"

"Right up there."

Shawn pointed to two vacant seats on the stage, right next to the principal.

"On stage?"

"Sure. Best seats in the house."

Shawn began to push his way through the crowd. Gus did his best to follow, but they got separated in the hubbub.

Finally, he reached Shawn, who had already leaped onto the podium and was talking to the principal.

"You were supposed to be here an hour ago, Mr. Spencer," the principal was saying.

"Sorry about that, Mr. Haynes. We were unavoidably detained."

_There's that phrase again..._Gus thought to himself.

Shawn was definitely up to something.

"Are you ready?"

"Of course!" Shawn snorted.

"Okay, then take your seats. We're going to get started soon."

Mr. Haynes checked his watch and strolled up to the microphone.

"Ready for what, Shawn?" Gus asked, his heart beginning to pound.

"Don't worry about it," Shawn waved him off breezily.

"Shawn! What did you do?"

"Nothing!"

Shawn sat in one of the chairs and began to flip through the program, as if nothing in the world was wrong. Gus knew better. He sat next to him, shooting daggers with his eyes. It took Shawn a minute to notice.

"What?"

"Shawn. What. Did.You. Do?"

Gus punctuated each syllable with a sharp jab into Shawn's ribs.

"Nothing."

"I'll kill you. I swear! Right now, with all these witnesses. I'll serve the jail time, Shawn. You know I will!"

"Gus, has anyone ever told you that you have massive trust issues? As long as you have your speech ready, you'll be fine!"

"Speech?!" Gus nearly shouted, then quickly lowered his voice to a dangerously quiet roar.

"What speech, Shawn?"

"Didn't I mention it? We're the keynote speakers at graduation this year! Isn't that fantastic? And to think that when we came here, they said I'd never amount to anything!"

All the blood drained from Gus' face.

"We're supposed to give a speech? Here? In front of…all these people?"

"Don't worry. I'll take care of everything. Just sit back and relax."

Gus' nails were digging so deeply into the metal folding chair that he was sure there would be deep grooves underneath the seat before the night was through.

"You'll take care of it?" He repeated, beads of sweat already beginning to break out on his forehead.

"Of course! Gus, have I ever let you down?"

"Yes."

"You know, you could have at least pretended you needed a few seconds to think about it," Shawn grumped, sounding hurt.

"Well, I didn't," Gus snapped.

Mr. Hayne's voice interrupted their argument, signaling the beginning of the ceremony. Gus was shaking so badly he couldn't even see the graduates filing in. The blood was thundering in his ears so loudly he couldn't even hear the music.

The ceremony moved quickly. Too quickly for Gus.

Before he knew it, Mr. Haynes was introducing them. Somehow, he was never quite sure how, he managed to stumble to his feet and make his way to the microphone. Shawn was grinning from ear to ear.

"Graduation." He said, with a long, dramatic pause.

"Wow."

"Great speech, Shawn," Gus mumbled under his breath.

"You know, I've never been any good with words," Shawn continued. "But my friend, Mr. Burton Guster…well, he's been working on a speech for weeks now. And, dang, it's good! Funny, insightful…poignant. So if it's all the same to you people, I'm just going to shut up now and hand the mic over to him. Gus?"

Shawn began to applaud, and the whole audience followed suit. He stepped aside and motioned Gus to take the microphone.

Gus' mind went blank.

He couldn't even remember his name.

Every limb was shaking. Every pore was leaking.

Finally, he cleared his throat, and said the only thing that came to his mind.

_Oh, God! Not that!_ He thought frantically, even as the words came pouring out of his mouth. _Any song but that one!_

But he couldn't control the words now.

He couldn't stop them.

"If you had one shot," he began. "One opportunity…to seize everything you ever wanted…in one moment…would you capture it? Or let it slip?"

"Dude, isn't that from 8 Mile?" Shawn whispered, endlessly amused.

Gus ignored him, pausing for a long sip of water.

He started speaking again once the glass was drained, not even hearing the words now. They were flowing naturally. With inflection. With feeling.

They sounded pretty good.

"You better lose yourself in the music. The moment. You own it. You better never let it go."

"Ho!" Shawn added, not very helpfully.

"You only get one shot. Do not miss your chance to blow. This opportunity comes once in a lifetime, yo."

Gus cleared his throat.

"For a moment like this," he pressed on, "some people wait a lifetime. For a moment like this, some people search forever. Some people wait a lifetime…"

He banged his hand on the podium for emphasis.

"For a moment like this."

He paused again, as if pondering something profound he had just said.

"In conclusion, working too hard can give you a heart attack. Ak. Ak. Ak. Ak. Thank you."

He sat down quickly to thunderous applause. Students whistled loudly, parents and friends roared.

Shawn was laughing hysterically.

"Dude. That was awesome! Totally worth the two hundred dollar donation to the alumi fund!"


End file.
